Movie Time

I saw Thor in 3-D Friday night. Amazing. A colleague had 20% off tickets that were expiring that day so a friend and I went. Tickets ran about $11 dollars. Popcorn and two drinks were $7.50. Not bad for a Friday night show. When you buy tickets you choose where you want to sit. I thought it was interesting that the row letters were English which made it easy for me to find my seat. I worry about those kind of things. The previews were all in Korean and were mostly ads. Then the movie began in English.

Spoiler Alert! Spoiler Alert!
Thor is one of the worst movies I have ever seen! I know. What was I expecting? The answer was, "Not much." Yet, still, I was disappointed. Even the 3D effects were few and far between. At least this time the scientists were not the bad guys. That really is the only positive thing I can say about the movie. The moment I saw Anthony Hopkins in Viking battle garb I thought the movie was going to be really bad. My next thought was more of a plea. "Please don't show Anthony Hopkins in Viking battle gear again." Request denied. Ugh.

Fortunately for Natalie Portman, she had a career before this movie because she is awful. Hey, there is a huge atmospheric disturbance in the middle of the desert. Let's drive top speed directly into it...from the passenger side. You see, the driver thought driving into a sand storm was a bad idea. Too bad the driver never thought to take her foot off the accelerator while fighting the passenger for control of the steering wheel.

After collecting data from the disturbance which resulted in them hitting Thor, the astrophysicist (Natalie Portman) comments on how the edge of the vortex looks like some curve described by Einstein. This leads to the following dialog:

"What kind of curve is that?", asks the female assistant who was driving the van described above.

"I thought you were a science major", says the male scientist.

"Political science."

To which Natalie Portman immediately interjects, "She was the only applicant."

That is good stuff. Later when the government seizes all of her equipment, the three 'scientists' go to the library where one of them finds a book that explains Thor and the vortex and travel between different realms.

"Where did you find that?"

"The children's section."

I give up. An astrophysicist loses all her equipment and data but fortunately finds all her answers in a children's book at the library. I simply give up.At least when my experiments are not going well you will know where to find me.

Later, Thor was able to retrieve her notebook with a picture of nine planets she has drawn.

"At least now I wont have to start from scratch." (Yes, her scientific career resides in that ten page notebook - blogger's edit).

"You must never give up your search," encourages Thor. "Your ancestors called it magic. You call it science. In my realm it is both. Here let me show you." Thor then proceeds to draw a line around the planets in Natalie Portman's notebook. She is absolutely enthralled.

"Oh, tell me more," she says in her most seductive tone.


IT'S A LINE! Ah yes, trans-dimensional travel to other worlds can be explained by drawing a line. It's so simple. How could I have missed it?

Thor is truly one of the worst movies I have ever seen. As such, I was thoroughly entertained. I was also happy the movies here are in English with Korean subtitles (many anyway)  which has an interesting consequence. Sometimes, the subtitles are displayed before the entire line is delivered. That results in the audience laughing before the joke is actually told. Once again the English speaker is slow on the up take. That's okay. I'm really pleased to be able to see movies at the theater ...in 3-D!