'You may find yourself living in a shotgun shack
You may find yourself in another part of the world
You may find yourself behind the wheel of a large automobile
You may find yourself in a beautiful house with a beautiful wife
You may ask yourself, well, how did I get here?'
Amen to that question.
It turns out the answer begins in March of 2009. On a rainy Friday a few of my friends met up for a drink after work. One of them was the director of a research institute who brought his umbrella thinking it was going to rain. When a table opened up, we grabbed it. A few minutes later, a very pretty young woman came to our table carrying an umbrella. "Did somebody forget this?", and then she walked away.
I was the only single person at this table having gotten divorced a few months earlier. I was really having trouble going out since I had been away from the dating game for a very long time. Anyway, I had a thought that to me was funny. "Yeah right, I bet she took your umbrella so she could come over to meet me." Another friend looks at me, asks for the umbrella, and leaves. He quickly returned and we continued drinking.
About ten minutes later, "Did someone forget this umbrella again?" Oh my God. He had told her that I was a really good guy and that she should meet me. I have the best friends. They are amazing, and when I had no idea what to say they all picked up the slack. This group effort resulted in getting her phone number.
When I called, it sort of went like this scene from Swingers:
It wasn't quite that painful. When I got her voice mail I said," Hey this is Brad. When you're free perhaps we can get some wings. My phone number is... oh my God, I've forgotten my phone number." Click.
Smooth. So smooth. I retold this story at work to my young friends across the hall. They had never seen Swinger's so I lent them the movie. They thought it was hilarious, and we started hanging out.
One night we were at a student lounge. I was talking to a woman who had taken cooking courses at Notre Dame University. Being from Indiana, I was money.
"I should teach you how to cook. It's fun."
"That would be great. The last time my daughter and I tried to cook, it didn't go so well."
And she was gone. Oh well, I was in the land of the twenty somethings. It wasn't surprising. As I was about to leave, one of my young friends stops me.
"You can't leave yet. I just met the most amazing woman in the bathroom." It takes me a few seconds to understand why I am having trouble comprehending him.
"Yeah, I was too drunk to use the men's room upstairs, so I used the women's. She was in the stall next to me. She is amazing."
She was indeed amazing. For a brief period in time we were really in love. Unfortunately, we were going to be long distance since she was starting a nonprofit to help support orphans in Nepal. I didn't want to do long distance, but I would have gone anywhere to be with her. And then I got an offer in Seoul. It wasn't Nepal, but it was as close as I could get.
While that relationship didn't survive the long distance, there was no way I could have made this move without the emotional connection I had with her at the time. I could not have done it alone. I would have been too afraid, and I would not have gotten tenure.
"You may ask yourself, well, how did I get here?"
A kind act returns an umbrella, a friend uses the wrong restroom, and I get tenure. I love the paths in life.
